If you are reading this blog then I kindly ask that you respect the fact that I am already a mother. I am a mother to angels, a step daughter and a foster daughter. I feel that I am a mother with years of experience from the age 12+ and a mother with the mostContinue reading “Irrational or rational?”
Tag Archives: hope
On the fence
We had another scan and this time the babies measured 14 weeks. This takes us back to the original dates we were given by the IVF clinic. We paid for this private scan as we were concerned about waiting till 16 weeks. We have also had lots of stress in relation to the house andContinue reading “On the fence”
Second Trimester
It has been a difficult week emotionally. I’m not sure if it’s my hormones at this stage or if it’s the fact the anniversary of my mum passing is fast approaching. I’m also very mindful that Kora and Ava passed in the second trimester. I don’t feel safe that we have reached the 13th week,Continue reading “Second Trimester”
A Pain Like No Other
I have been touched and saddened by the recent revelation from Chrissy Teigen and John Legend that they delivered their baby Jack sleeping. If you are unaware Chrissy Teigen posted photographs on Instagram which captured their delivery of their baby. When looking at the photos you can see the grief and heartache. It is rawContinue reading “A Pain Like No Other”
Twelve weeks
It’s official we have reached twelve weeks. Interestingly I don’t feel relieved or safe. I am too aware that we lost Kora and Ava in the second trimester and that there are no guarantees in a pregnancy. This past week has been very stressful due to external factors. I was so stressed it blocked allContinue reading “Twelve weeks”
Harsh Reality
My last blog I wrote about how Neil and I were starting to dare to dream. We have been looking into extending or moving as we simply don’t have enough space for twins, Amy (step daughter) and Alissa (foster daughter). We were anxious about making these plans as we know that no pregnancy has anyContinue reading “Harsh Reality”
Dare to Dream
We had another scan yesterday. We will be 10 weeks pregnant this Friday. For us this time has moved so slowly and has been filled with anxiety. I was left feeling very emotional and couldn’t stop crying for hours. I had built my anxiety level to such a heightened state with fear that the IVFContinue reading “Dare to Dream”
A Prison Sentence
I was talking to a very good friend on the phone the other day and he referred to my pregnancy as a prison sentence. I laughed as I knew what he meant. He said he feels like he is actually marking off the days on the wall. Of course most people would not refer toContinue reading “A Prison Sentence”
Self preservation.
I’m already madly in love with both of the babies that are growing inside me. This frightens me as I know how hard the potential fall can be! Im definitely not enjoying the pregnancy but my self preservation is slipping as each day passes. My hope grows as much as my love! I have neverContinue reading “Self preservation.”
Blood!
Yesterday I had a cramp on my right side, I wasn’t too bothered as I know to expect some cramps whilst the uterus adjusts to having not just one baby but two. However when I added the cramp to the worry that my pregnancy hormones were either subduing or I was getting more used toContinue reading “Blood!”