Blood and Tears

I am writing this blog from the hospital. I had to come here yesterday and stay the night. I had got out of the bath and while putting my nightie on and applying the bio oil, I felt something fall out of my vagina. To my horror there was blood on the carpet. In aContinue reading “Blood and Tears”

Too Posh to Push!

I am unsure who originally phrased Caesarean section (c-section) as a woman being too posh to push but as April is C section awareness month it feels appropriate to write and challenge some perceptions around this. It is also feels apt as we have been given our date for C section in the month ofContinue reading “Too Posh to Push!”

Nesting

It’s an expression banded around especially when a pregnancy is talked about. It’s not just the human race that undertake it either. It’s the natural instinct to make your home organised and ready for the arrival. I have the urge to make the house ready and more prepared for the arrival of the twins yetContinue reading “Nesting”

Pregnancy after loss

I am writing this blog as I feel that there is a lack of awareness about how difficult it is to be pregnant after loss(es). As humans we always like to hear good news stories and I have noticed that when I write about my current pregnancy I get lovely responses and support. However whenContinue reading “Pregnancy after loss”

Twenty weeks

It’s been a very long twenty weeks for us. Our pregnancy has been full of anxiety, scans and medical visits but we have made it to twenty weeks. At our very first scan at the IVF clinic they consultant told us about disappearing twin and stated it can happen up to twenty weeks. It wasContinue reading “Twenty weeks”

Failure

I had a medical assessment yesterday as social services require one because Neil and I are kinship foster carers. It involves answering questions about my general health and the doctor confirming any facts about my health and well being. I also have to undertake mobility, weight and height assessments. As part of the lengthy formContinue reading “Failure”

Irrational or rational?

If you are reading this blog then I kindly ask that you respect the fact that I am already a mother. I am a mother to angels, a step daughter and a foster daughter. I feel that I am a mother with years of experience from the age 12+ and a mother with the mostContinue reading “Irrational or rational?”

On the fence

We had another scan and this time the babies measured 14 weeks. This takes us back to the original dates we were given by the IVF clinic. We paid for this private scan as we were concerned about waiting till 16 weeks. We have also had lots of stress in relation to the house andContinue reading “On the fence”

Second Trimester

It has been a difficult week emotionally. I’m not sure if it’s my hormones at this stage or if it’s the fact the anniversary of my mum passing is fast approaching. I’m also very mindful that Kora and Ava passed in the second trimester. I don’t feel safe that we have reached the 13th week,Continue reading “Second Trimester”

A Pain Like No Other

I have been touched and saddened by the recent revelation from Chrissy Teigen and John Legend that they delivered their baby Jack sleeping. If you are unaware Chrissy Teigen posted photographs on Instagram which captured their delivery of their baby. When looking at the photos you can see the grief and heartache. It is rawContinue reading “A Pain Like No Other”